The Bald Goat

Well, I didn’t get many comments from my last blog post.  I am sure that the 18 million people who visited my site had something to contribute…

What was that?

Oh…18 people…not 18 million…

Thank you Google Analytics for keeping me humble…

I do get comments, some on the web, and some in person.  I really appreciate the feedback.  It turns this into a conversation instead of a lecture! (Really, who wants a lecture!?)

I love the song in the last post.  I hope you took the time to listen to it.  It is beautiful and poignant.  There are a few things that I want to point out from the song that I think sum up the point of this portion of my thoughts about ordinary people.

There is a committed relationship.  The man is singing to his beloved and his message is one of unity.  He is not hiding any of the feelings that they both share.  They both make mistakes and they both often feel like giving up and walking away, but they are committed to one another and this relationship.  Do we see this kind of relationship of commitment in the body of Christ?  How about just in your local church you are a part of?  This disunity that I mentioned in part 2a comes from our lack of commitment to our church family.  We don’t see it like we see a marriage or our view of marriage is shaky.  The last thing we want to happen to a marriage is divorce.  The last thing we should want to happen in a church family is for someone to leave the family and try to find a place somewhere else or worse yet, to not care about finding that place.  This song gives us the picture of love we should see when we look at our church family.  Christ looks at the church as his bride and if we follow his example, we would too.

A friend shared a story with me of a time when she heard through the grapevine that her son had gotten a tongue ring.  She was so upset about this.  She admits that she does not know why it upset her so much, but she was livid.  She went right up to him and told him that it was either her or the tongue ring.  She walked out the door to leave and go to work, but before she ever reached her car he turned her around and held out his hand.  In it was the tongue ring.  She meant more to him than any fashion statement.  He loved her enough to put aside what he wanted and what he thought was cool.  Because he loved her he made a sacrifice for her.  Do we love our church family enough to sacrifice for them? Even when we don’t agree with what is happening?  Especially when we don’t agree with what is happening?  Do we love them this much?

As we look more at this song we see a story of give and take.  Back and forth.  One line says “as our love advances we take second chances”.  We don’t have the patience for second chances without love.  We don’t give second chances without a love that doesn’t keep a record of wrong.  We need a love that hopes.  A love that perseveres. A love that never fails.

The climax of the song does a back and forth with possibilities…

live and learn…crash and burn

maybe you’ll stay…maybe you’ll leave…maybe you’ll return

maybe another fight…maybe we won’t tonight

and then the final line with hope and encouragement says “maybe we’ll grow”…

There is a love that doesn’t want to give up.  There is a love that will give it a second chance.  There is a love that grows closer and tighter through the good times and the bad.  There is a love of Christ.

There is a line in this song repeated dozens of times “Maybe we should take it slow”.  When I hear this I think of the verse in James 1:19:

Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.

It is like the temper tantrum control method where we take a deep breath, count to ten, and then react.

I guess sometimes we could count to 10,000 and we still struggle to find peace and love for our church family.  We need to take things slow and allow ourselves to handle difficult situations with love.  We need to be committed enough to each other that we are willing to take it slow, to love like Christ, and find a way to make things work.

We need to love these ordinary people.

We need to be loved as we, too, are ordinary people.

Then, because we love each other enough to get along, our efforts will be united to heal our hurting world.

Then, because we love each other enough to get along, the good news of God can be heard.

Because we love each other enough.

I recently had the privilidge of reading Donald Miller’s new book A Million Miles in a Thousand Years.  In this book, Donald Miller takes us through the process of editing a life in order to write a story, his life to be exact.  As always, Miller mixes humor with insight to share his wisdom about how to intentionally live a life as a story with a purpose.

This book is almost too easy to read.  It is deceptive in its simplicity when the concepts and ideas are so powerful and profound.  I think often with books like this, the worth of the book lies in its power to actually affect the way you look at life or live life after the last page is read.  I mentioned in an earlier blog post that things that fit into this category are not common.  When something comes along that actually changes you, it is remarkable.

I believe my life is different after reading this book.  I couldn’t wait to share with my wife what I had read and what we should do.  I was really inspired by this book and I want to purposefully create a story for myself and my family.  Miller paints a beautiful picture of a scene after death where we sit with God under a tree and share with Him the stories from our lives.  I pray that I have many stories to share with God and to hear Him say, “Yes, I remember that. I was there. This is a good story.  Well done!”

Please listen to the following song by John Legend called “Ordinary People”. I plan to follow up this post with how I believe this song can shed some light on how to love church people. I have pasted the lyrics below. Please leave a comment with your thoughts and ideas.

(Due to copyright restrictions I don’t think I can upload the mp3 I have on my computer to this site. I don’t know why, but the embedded player will only play 30 sec. of the song. Please click the link that says “Play Full Song Here” to listen to the entire song on imeem.com.)

Ordinary People - John Legend

“Ordinary People”

Girl, I’m in love with you,
but this ain’t the honeymoon
we’re past the infatuation phase.
We’re right in the thick of love,
at times we get sick of love,
it seems like we argue every day.

[Bridge]

I know I misbehaved
and you made your mistakes
and we both still got room left to grow.
And though love sometimes hurts,
I still put you first
and we’ll make this thing work,
but I think we should take it slow.

[Chorus]

We’re just ordinary people,
we don’t know which way to go.
‘Cos we’re ordinary people,
Maybe we should take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.

[Verse 2]

This ain’t a movie no,
no fairy tale conclusion ya’ll,
it gets more confusing every day.
Oh, sometimes it’s heaven sent,
then we head back to hell again,
we kiss then we make up on the way.

[Bridge]

I hang up, you call,
we rise and we fall
and we feel like just walking away,
but as our love advances
we take second chances,
though it’s not a fantasy
I Still want you to stay.

[Chorus]

We’re just ordinary people,
we don’t know which way to go.
‘Cos we’re ordinary people,
Maybe we should take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.

[Verse 3]

Take it slow.

Maybe we’ll live and learn,
maybe we’ll crash and burn,
maybe you’ll stay, maybe you’ll leave,
maybe you’ll return.
Maybe another fight,
maybe we won’t survive,
but maybe we’ll grow,
we never know, baby you and I.

[Chorus]

We’re just ordinary people,
we don’t know which way to go.
‘Cos we’re ordinary people,
Maybe we should take it slow.
We’re just ordinary people,
we don’t know which way to go.
‘Cos we’re ordinary people,
Maybe we should take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.

I want to continue this discussion about what it means to think of ourselves as ordinary people.  This was not intended to be a degrading comment, but possibly an idea that places us on equal ground to gain a perspective of our place in life…and our potential.  I think this continued conversation about ordinary people has many different points that all help us gain a different perspective on how we live life in this world filled with a bunch of ordinary people.

Lets look at a question to help us set the tone of this conversation and give us some roots.

Why do we put up with the people in our church?

I bet there are thoughts of people right now swimming through your head about people that bother you, anger you, hurt you, or annoy you at your church.  I mean there has to be at least one person that rubs you the wrong way.  We are human and we will have our issues, right?

So why do we put up with each other or maybe a better question, what enables us to put up with each other?

Love

It sounds simple, but can be so hard.  Lets look at the how Paul describes love in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.   Love never fails. (NIV)

I think we seriously grapple with many of these things.

love is patient…wow…and that was the first one!

Love does not keep a record of wrongs…really?

Love always trusts…come on!

If we can do this love stuff with our church family, then I think we can do anything!  I say this with a bit of sarcasm and a bit of truth.  This kind of love is the hardest thing that we struggle to do and if we as Christians were truely united with this kind of love the world would be a different place.

The world would be different.

I truly believe what I just said and I truly believe we fail to do this.  Why would there be so many different denominations if we could get along? Or better yet, why would there be so many different churches of the same denomination in one town if we could get along?  I understand the history of church planting.  Communities with a church on every corner, but that was 50 years ago.  Today, I would wager that the number one reason most churches are created today, or have been created in the past 20 yeas, is because we can’t get along with each other so we decide to take the easy way out and disassociate ourselves with our now former family.  We choose not to show love and instead choose to distance ourselves into two separate entities.

The voice of God cannot be heard over the roar of our debates and bickering.  The message of God never has the chance to reach the ears of the unbeliever because we fill the air with our message of discontentment with each other.

Because we don’t love each other enough to get along our efforts are not united to heal our hurting world.

Because we don’t love each other enough to get along the good news of God cannot be heard.

Because we don’t love each other enough.

Please take the time to experience the next post Ordinary People (part 2b) and leave a comment with your thoughts.

I wanted to make this addition to my previous blog post:

More ideas from the previous blog post can be found in the book 12 Ordinary Men by John MacArthur.  I have not read the entire book, but the portions that I have read are really good!  It is going on my book list for the near future and I would recommend checking it out to find out more about 12 men God decided to use to change the world.  This is just a story about those 12.  The Bible contains stories of more and history contains even more stories of ordinary people just like you and me that did extra-ordinary things.

I have come across a problem that I believe most people in the world struggle with from time to time.  We begin to believe that some people are super.  This may not sound like such a bad thing at first and someone’s face possibly even popped into your head as I mentioned super people!  But, we have the tendency to place people on a pedestal.  The problem is that we hold them in such esteem that the person we imagine when we think of this person is not even a real person anymore.

Stick with me on this one…

Cary Grant was once the coolest man on the planet.  His character in The Awful Truth was a unique combination of cool glamour and warm approachability that everyone, including Grant himself, came to marvel at.  “Everyone wants to be Cary Grant,” he once said; “even I wish I could be Cary Grant.”  The truth is, if you ever had the chance to meet this real person you are amazed by you would be floored at how normal this person was.  Has anyone ever been in the presence of a celebrity or someone they thought very highly of and thought, “This person is so awesome and he/she is just a normal, ordinary guy!”  We see someone eating and think , “They chew with their mouth open!” or we see someone come out of the bathroom and think, “They have to poop!?”  It just amazes us, for some reason, that people have to do people things. Normal everyday, ordinary people things.  Just like you and just like me.  Amazing!

So here is is. The truth like none other.  Everybody is ordinary.  Everybody.

Nobody is special. Nobody.

Does this burst your bubble?

I have to tell you that this one statement is one of the most encouraging things that anybody could ever tell me!  Confused?  Let me explain.

I think that Bono from the Rock band U2 is amazing.  I am amazed at his music.  I am amazed at his philanthropic work with AIDS relief and efforts to eliminate debts of struggling countries.  His work politically to bring nations together to help nations is powerful.  He is a Christian and what he believes is reflected in how he lives his life.  As an example of absolute cool, in a private meeting between Pope John Paul II and Bono, the Pope decides to wear Bono’s sunglasses!  Let me say that again, the Pope wanted to wear Bono’s sunglasses!  Does a guy get any cooler than that!?  Bono would be someone that I would have a problem seeing as an ordinary guy.

But Bono had his bad days.

Bono goes to the bathroom.

Bono gets angry.

Bono makes mistakes.

Bono is really just an ordinary guy.

Just like me.  Just like you.

Now here is the difference between Bono and me.  Bono has done some extra-ordinary things.  He is an ordinary guy who has done some extra ordinary things.  Here is the part that really encourages me…I, as an ordinary guy like Bono, can do extra-ordinary things too!

This idea of ordinary is not limiting, but empowering!  We all have within us the ability to do remarkable things.

I think we often don’t feel like we have the ability to do amazing things and so we don’t.  Not because we can’t, but because we don’t.

We don’t try.

We don’t look for opportunities.

We don’t imagine possibilities.

We don’t believe in ourselves and so we just don’t.

I believe that we can do extra-ordinary things.  I believe that I can do extra-ordinary things.  I believe you can do extra-ordinary things.

Need biblical proof, look at the disciples.  There was not a more ordinary, plain, simple group of ragtag men ever assembled in all of history.  God chose to use these ordinary people to impact the world!  God can use ordinary people like Bono to impact the world.  God can use ordinary people like you and me to impact the world.  Ordinary people, used by God, to do extra-ordinary things.

How is God going to use you?

This past weekend, my wife and I watched the movie Slumdog Millionaire.  It is the story of an 18 year old kid from Mumbai, who grew up in the slums and becomes a contestant on the Indian version of “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?” He is arrested under suspicion of cheating, and while being interrogated, events from his life history are shown which explain why he knows the answers.

I really liked the story and the way it was told.  It was interesting how so many random and unconnected events in this kid’s life would end up giving him the answers to the random and unconnected questions in the game show.  It was almost comical how these things came together sometimes.  I thought the cinematography was top notch and everything just seemed to fit.  A well put together movie.  I must admit, this movie was more than just an excuse to eat popcorn and candy.  There were themes in this movie that are powerful and realities that are revealed that can’t be ignored.  Don’t get the wrong idea.  This movie focused on telling the main story and did not become cheesy or over the top as these messages were exposed.  This is apparently very difficult to do and I applaud the screenwriters for an excellent job of walking this fine line.

One of the things that really stood out to me was the absolute poverty that was represented in this movie.  Images of scrounging through the trash heaps, kids sleeping on top of trash, slums built out of scraps within the areas of the garbage dump, children begging, and more. Other things that seemed to be depicted as a normal way of life, washing clothes in a dirty river, are out of the norm in my American cultural experience.  It was really amazing to imagine a world where this could be real and happening today.  I know that America’s poor, although still a desperate condition, do not compare to the absolute poverty faced by billions in third world countries around the globe.  To get a glimpse into this world and open our eyes to this reality was profound and moving.

The main character, Jamal, is surrounded by the underbelly of his world.  Everyone from gang leaders, corrupt officials, sleazy game show hosts, and even his own brother are just terrible and what you would call “low-life-scum”. But through it all, Jamal remains the incorruptible hero with a sense of purpose, honesty, and integrity that defy his upbringing.  He does not come across as naive, but realizes the consequences his decisions could have and still continues to do the right thing.  This powerful message is seen over and over again in the movie and I think it is a message that we could use more of today.  Don’t get me wrong, our hero is not perfect and he makes mistakes.  This humanity is what makes his struggles identifiable.  We can relate to someone who struggles and makes mistakes and we connect to the better person he is seeking to be.

I really liked this movie and would recommend watching it.  Be ready, there are some intense scenes that are not glossed over.  It can be disturbing to see the levels of desperation and inhumanity some people will sink to for survival and power.  If you choose to watch this movie, may it open your eyes and touch your heart.  May your heart be broken by the things that break the heart of God.  May you also find inspiration and strength in this story.

What are the momentous occasions in life?  The big things that really make a difference in the way we live?  Like when a person moves away from home or gets married or has children.  Maybe when a person begins to actually provide financially for themselves.  Possibly there are many steps in this independence phase along life where a person learns to feed themselves, learns to bath themselves, learns to be responsible with school or work, begins paying a bill with their money for something they recieve, and so on. These things either change a life or indicate a change in a life.

These things are big changes that pretty much effect the whole life all at one time.  The world this person lives in will never be the same.  But I realize that some things in a changed life are more subtle.  Or possibly it is the culmination of many things along the same direction that over time make a difference and change a life.

I don’t want to seem like I am getting hung up on phrases or expressions, but sometimes I hear people say, “That book changed my life!” or “That movie changed my life!”  Do they say this because they can actually see that they are a different person after this than they were before this?  Can they see the change and put their finger on it?  Or was this a really good book or movie or whatever that possibly will add to a series of happenings that will have a gradual change over time to make a difference in a life?  I don’t want to be critical of this phrase, but I also realize that we are (I will put this in the most positive perspective I can find) a people of stability.  We don’t change much.  We seek to find a point of stability, of familiarity, of comfort and we stay there.  So, it makes me think, “Was this thing really something that is going to move you out of your comfort and stability into something different and unfamiliar?

I don’t believe that we actually come across that many things that will “change our life”. There are just not that many things powerful enough to move us.  There are many things, I believe that should change us and I believe that we realize that they should change us, but we don’t allow them to change us.  They will not change us because we are unwilling to change.  We may read a book or watch a movie or whatever and be struck by some profound themes and we come away from it thinking that we should be different, but in reality nothing happens.  At least nothing noticable.  At best these things will add up to make a change eventually, but then again nothing may ever happen.

I don’t want to be overly critical of this occurance.  I do believe that things like this can add up to create an eventual change in a life, but I think that often we do not allow these things to make the change themselves.

I believe that the things that really change us are truely remarkable.  To read a book and it have such a profound impact that it does actually change your life is remarkable.  To watch a movie and be so moved to change your life is remarkable.  These things don’t happen often, but when they do it is powerful and…life changing.

May God place before us the truely remarkable things with a message that penetrates our comfort and stability to impact our soul and change our lives.

And may we, when presented with something profound, have the willingness to submit to the change that is taking place within us.

I have been really turned off lately by a phrase that has become a part of our vocabulary.  I hear it all the time and I don’t believe it is meant to cause harm, but I wonder if it is not causing more damage than we realize.  When we meet someone and find out they are a Christian, we ask the the question, “What church do you attend?”

Seems harmless, right?

You may say, “what is the big deal?  That seems like a perfectly valid question!”

The information that we seek is not what is inappropriate to me about this question.  It is the word “attend”.  It has an edge to it that is about to drive me nuts!  People attend concerts, movies, ballets, and the theater. Why on earth would we ask them about a church that they attend?!  You may think that I am making too big a deal about this and that I have gone off the deep end, and maybe you are right!  But when we begin inserting the idea that church is a thing that you attend I believe we diminish the scope of what church could and should be.

Maybe we have never really looked for the appropriate word for this question.  Like I said before, I don’t think the answer we are asking for is inappropriate, but the wording shows us what we think of church in our culture.  Is church really a thing that we should attend?  What if by giving this question, and other statements about church, better wording, we can change our culture’s perspective on what church could and should be?

Does this sound like to much to ask of a simple word choice?  I don’t think so!

I want to hear some of your thoughts.  I have an idea or two and will follow up this blog next week.  Until then, leave you thoughts in the comments so that we may all be enriched by your perspective.

As I blow the dust off my blog, I type these words…

It has been an unfortunate amount of time since I have posted.  I expect there are many things that have kept me away.  I would like to think that it has been a lack of time due to the busyness of the summer. I think there may be some truth to that, but I know that if I had really wanted to blog, I would have. I think I just didn’t know what to say.

Many things have been going through my head these last few months and I have struggled to get a grip on my brain.  I have felt clouded and frustrated.   But things seem to be different now.  I don’t want to give him a big head (or bigger head…for those of you that know him), but I have RobertBlas to thank for much of my new found clarity.  He sent me away for a few days to clear my head and collect my thoughts.  I did not come back with all the problems of the world wrapped up in nice neat little packages.  My life was still just as messy as before, but this getaway gave me the opportunity to step back, stop time almost, and look at what was going on in my life and identify some areas that had become a real challenge.  It is amazing the feeling of coming out of the dark.  Like I said before I still had problems after my getaway, but I knew, at least better than before, what those problems were.

I have been thinking that I need this blog.  I need the avenue that it can give me to gain some perspective from those of you who are kind enough to read it.  I feel that in many ways I have some thoughts that need thinking.  My mind is not big enough to think these thoughts alone and I need help.  I honestly have many things to blog about - some serious, some not so serious, and some just downright silly.  I believe I have been avoiding this blog because I have been afraid to blog the serious thoughts.  I want to find strength in sharing and so I will.  Don’t worry, they will not all be serious!

As I collect these thoughts I will share them, but I also want to make a commitment.  This is not so much for you, but for me.  If it is true that I need this outlet to get things out and put into words thoughts and feelings, then I need to commit myself to doing this.  One of the best ways to do this is to tell people what I am going to do.  Allow that to be a motivator to keep doing what I said I would do.  And so here it is…I want to blog at least once a week.  I will put up a post by Friday of each week.  It may happen more, but it will not happen less.  That is not too hard is it?

So, if you are reading this, you know about my blog.  If you are willing to help me, leave me a comment when I post.  Tell me what you think about what I put into words.  If you feel so moved, tell your friends and encourage them to leave a comment too! I believe it will do me good to hear a perspective other than my own as I look for answers to the things that challenge me.