The Bald Goat

Me and My Tooth

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 16:33:00 -0600

Last week I went to visit my cousin in Flower Mound, TX. It was the greatest thing I have done for myself in a long time. You see my cousin is a dentist and and I was in major pain.

You see, I was minding my own business one Friday afternoon and decided I wanted to enjoy a great piece of beef jerky. This seems like a perfectly harmless thing to do, but the moment I bit into this piece of beef jerky, I knew something was terribly wrong.

The pain was immediate and intense. It was sharp and dull all at the same time and it wouldn’t go away. It is apparently a bad idea to have any kind of dental crisis anytime after 12 on Friday afternoons because all dentist offices in the world close down Friday afternoons. If I was a dentist I think I would skip normal office hours on Monday and Tuesday and stay open all day Friday and Saturday instead. I could be wrong, but it seems like there is an untapped market there…

Anyway, I called up my cousin, (who was at a dentist convention…on a Friday afternoon…filled with hundreds of dentists doing continuing education…on a Friday afternoon! I am not kidding they are all closed!) and he called in a prescription for pain meds until I could get to him or a local dentist for treatment. This is an absolute lifesaver. I don’t know how I would have made it through the weekend except to say that the scene from Cast Away with Tom Hanks went through my head a couple of times. Glad I didn’t have an ice skate handy!

So I make my way to Flower Mound just north of the Dallas/Ft Worth area. Not a bad 2 1/2 hour drive from Abilene, TX and well worth it to receive free dental care. I would suggest every family make it a point to have two professions in the family tree. One is a dentist and the other is a chiropractor. I have the utmost respect and admiration for anyone in these two fields of medicine for they are amazing!

I end up spending a couple of hours receiving a root canal from my cousin, Dr. Payne. Did I fail to mention his name before? Yes, you read that right, Dr. Payne [Pain] Funny name for a dentist, but at times amazingly appropriate. (Sometime I will tell you the story of the double root canal and crowns to teeth that he couldn’t deaden!) Like I said in the beginning this is the best thing I have done for myself in a long time. I am now pain free and a much happier camper!

Here is the thing about this whole ordeal. That tooth had almost complete control over me. It made me miserable. It made me not want to eat, not want to move, not want to even be awake. I just wanted to curl up in the fetal position with a blanky and shut myself off from the world! This tooth was so small and yet it had so much control.

average tooth = average 2 to 4 grams

my body weight = approx. 100,000 grams

tooth is 0.004% of my body and yet it was exerting its control over the whole kit and kaboodle! It made me think of places in the bible where small things take control. In James 3 he talks about a rudder controling a small ship and I can’t get the picture out of my head of the two guys with stuff in their eye. One has a speck and one has a plank and both are miserable! Ever had something in your eye or worse yet, ever had a scratch on your eye? Might as well pluck the thing out as to try to carry on with life business as usual. You gotta do something about it or everything is going nowhere.

You see, I believe we often underestimate the power of little things to have a huge impact. We don’t appreciate the power of little things to affect us. Consider finances. We have all heard the phrase “nickel and dime me to death!” or what about a small rock chip in a car windshield. That thing can grow and spiderweb its way all over the place. Now think of sin.

Are there really any sins that are worse than others? Should we rank them where murder is way up there and lying or not minding your parents is nearly insignificant? I think we do this. I think we believe that even if we don’t say it out loud. But the truth is everything that God hates we call a sin. And if God hates it, it can’t be good for us. And if it is not good for us then it is not good for us. Period.

These small things can devastate us in ways that can be so powerful that our entire life can come to a screeching halt. Our world can be turned upside down and all because of something small.

The power of this small thing can hurt…but it can also heal.

I am so thankful our High School group at Willis will carry on discussions and share ideas and perspectives. One of our HS girls was not going to allow negativity to be the only thing that can start small and grow big and have an unexpected and huge impact. If we will allow it, a small thing can change our day and make us smile, too.

I could have let that stinkin’ tooth ruin my weekend and it nearly did. It was miserable and I couldn’t even sleep lying down because the throbbing would wake me up. But I am blessed to have a cousin who could provide me with a prescription for medicine to ease the pain. To go even further than that, I live in a country where medicine is readily available. In some parts of the world it wouldn’t matter how much money you have, there are not drugs to help. And to even go a step further, we live in a time where these drugs even exist.

I am so blessed.

You might think I am being ridiculous, but it really is a matter of perspective. Little things can have the power to effect our lives, but we have the choice which small things we will allow to have this control. The positive things or the negative things.

The choice is yours…

The Verse Coming Out of the Verse

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:10:00 -0600

Musicals…have you ever wondered why someone thought it was a good idea to stop in the middle of a story and sing a song? Seriously! This sort of thing does not just happen. People don’t break into song and people certainly don’t begin complicated dance routines with average passers by on the street! I enjoy music and so have enjoyed musicals, but I have to suspend reality for a while and just enjoy what is going on. I want to share with you something that is revealing about this type of storytelling. Actually I want to share with you what Donald Miller has to say about things like this in his book Searching For God Knows What.

The thing about John Sailhammer is, he helped me love Moses. I don’t know if I had given Moses much thought before the class, but after hearing john Sailhammer talk about him, he became a human being to me. Dr. Sailhammer said Moses, unlike most writers in scripture, would stop the narrative to break into the kind of poetry he had quoted earlier, a kind of poetry called parallelism, which is where you say something and then repeat it using different phrasing.He said the way Moses wrote wasn’t unlike the way people who write musicals stop the story every once in a while to break into song. At first I thought Dr. Sailhammer was just making things up, but then he showed us in the text several places where the writer clearly stopped writing narrative and began writing poetry. The reason Moses would do this, according to John Sailhammer, is because there are emotions and situations and tensions that a human being feels in his life but can’t explain. And poetry is a literary tool that has the power to give a person the feeling he isn’t alone in those emotions, that, though there are no words to describe them, somebody understands.

I can’t tell you how beautiful I thought this was; I had always suspected language was quite limited in its ability to communicate the intricate mysteries of truth. By that I mean that if you have to describe loneliness or how beautiful your sweetheart is or the way a rainstorm smell in summer, you most likely have to use poetry because these things are not technical, they are romantic, and yet they exist and we interact and exchange these commodities with one another in a kind of dance.

I would really encourage you all to read this book because there is so much more he has to offer, but I want to stop here and think about what he has just told us. Drama is an art form to tell a story on a stage and musicals then mix another art form into drama to expand the ability of the performers to convey emotion and connect with the audience. You will see this in almost any movie or tv show. They may not break out into song (unless you are watching Glee), but there is almost always background music and that music is specifically designed to convey the emotions that the storyteller wants to convey at that moment.

We spent some time with our junior high and high school groups talking to them about this concept and then challenged them to find a story in the Bible and write a poem to go along with it. I asked them to pretend that they didn’t know how the story ends and plug themselves into the characters feelings and convey the emotion that might come out of the pages. It was a difficult challenge, but good thought came from this exercise and even a couple good poems. Many did not think they had anything worth sharing, but a few have said that I could post their poems in this blog. Their works are listed below. If you feel so inspired, share with us all a poem in the comments section.

On the Road to Damascus

While Saul breathed out the murderous threats against the Lord and friends,
The Lord knew what he really was, and all known murderous fiend.
And as he neared Damascus on his journey suddenly,
A light from heaven flashed about and he fell to a knee.
And then a voice asked him, “Saul, Saul, Why do you forsake me?”
“Who are you, Lord?” Saul asked. ”I am Christ whom your forsaking.”
And then the Lord replied to Saul, “Get up and go into
the city and you’ll be told whatever you are to do.”
The men with Saul looked all around, but no one could they find.
And when Saul opened up his eyes he found that he was blind!

~ Daniel Guerra - 8th grade

Leah’s Lament

Rachel is pretty,
I am not.
Rachel is lovable,
My love is bought.
Rachel is favorite,
as I am forgot.
Rachel got Jacob’s love,
I do not.
Rachel is everything,
Everything I’m not.

~ Jennifer Morrison - 7th grade

The Anger of Cain

I am dead

The fire within my soul has been blown out
by the only one who can light it.
The love of my family and the love of the One
have been ripped from my heart like the wing from a bird
and now I feel I will never fly again…

Why did he turn his back on me?

Why am I not good enough to find favor in his eyes?

I offered him my best, just like my brother,
but he hates what I have to give.

I am hollow inside.

What great frustration I feel at the lot I’ve been cast
to have a life full of pain…left behind…forgotten…

My hand shakes as I think of that brother of mine
that the Lord would accept and embrace and treat kind.
My anger cannot be contained and my rage can’t be subdued!
I fear the path I go down and the thoughts in my head.
My mind is so clouded by the fuming and fire
I fear I will do things that will push me out farther
from the love that I so desperately long for
and the embrace of the one who can make me feel
loved and surrounded by grace…

But he turned from me
and cast me away.
My soul is completely dead.

I feel so afraid…

~ Jeremy Voss

"Fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing."

Sun, 15 Nov 2009 12:25:06 -0600

“Fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing.”

- ~ Optimus Prime - Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Could the same be said of how we receive God’s call…

Community

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 23:43:00 -0600

I recently read a blog post by Lindsey Nobles about community that I really enjoyed and even left a comment. I wanted to share her article with you and the comments that I made because it encompasses much of what I have been thinking about the past couple of years and is also an area that we have begun discussing with our youth group at Willis. Please take the time to read Lindsey Nobles’ article “Defining Community” and then come back to read my thoughts as this relates to the local church family.

Here are my thoughts:

I have been in discussion with some of my friends about the ideas around community. We have largely focused our thoughts about church and what is the root benefit of gathering together. I could worship anywhere with anyone. I don’t have to know them and the group can be large or small. I don’t believe that what makes a church body is really the worship. More could be said about the other things that could easily be thought of as “attractive” to potential church members. (aesthetics of the building, age of congregation, size of congregation, technology, etc.) I believe that what creates a commitment to a church family is the relationships that are developed and the sense of community that is generated.

Has this ever happened to you? You hear of someone at your church that has gone and attended services at another church in town. What feelings are stirred inside you? If it was someone that you didn’t really know you might not think that much of it, but if they are close to you and you felt they were part of your circle, you might just feel betrayed. It is almost as if they were cheating on your “family” with another “family”!

Now don’t get me wrong here. I believe in the universal body of Christ and my particular congregation is not the only one handing out tickets to the pearly gates. It is not a feeling of superiority that would cause a reaction like this, but a breach in the community. A weakening of the bonds that encourage and strengthen us. I think the most important thing a church family can do is encourage one another and lift each other up. The most important thing a church can do is create community.

You might think I am getting way off the path with this line of thinking, but I think online communities are amazing! I also think there is great value and need for local Christian communities (otherwise known as churches). The thing is that online communities are thriving while many local Christian communities are struggling. I believe our emphasis as leaders has been misdirected to focus on things that might not really matter as much as we think they do. Our emphasis should be in the one thing that a local gathering of Christians can truly offer each other…community.

Lindsey’s post has made me realize that there is a medium that seems to be doing a good job at this. It is the online community of social networking. It is bringing people together and bonding people all around the globe to encourage and strengthen and share this life that we are going through. The thought that I will continue to think about is: What can we as church leaders learn about creating community from the world of online social networking?

Thanks for your thoughts, they make me think.
Also, thanks for listening. I believe you truly care about creating meaningful discussion.

I was going through some video footage and came across this...

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 07:37:19 -0600

I was going through some video footage and came across this drama skit our teens did a couple years ago. It is called “Marionettes”. It was put together and performed at the North Texas branch of LTC (Leadership Training for Christ). The theme for this year’s conference was from 1 Samuel 3:10. The Lord calls out to young Samuel and he responds “I’m Listening. What do you want me to do?” (CEV) In this skit, the teens listen to the call of Christ and His instructions to spread the good news of God’s saving grace and set free those who are under Satan’s control and bring them into the loving and protecting arms of our heavenly Father.

The Story of Me

Mon, 02 Nov 2009 14:02:40 -0600

I awoke one day in the middle of a field. I was surrounded by hundreds of orange things of all different sizes. I did not know what was going on. I heard someone say, “Wow this is going to be a big one!” There was a man in overalls looking down at me. He was talking about me! What did he mean? He rolled me over and I could see a small boy standing next to him. “Jim,” the man said to the boy, “we have to roll them a little every other day so that they don’t get an ugly spot on one side.” I was one of these orange things too!

I was a pumpkin!

Jim was very careful to help his dad to roll the pumpkins and he made sure that he did not let our stems get twisted either! I really liked Jim. He was such a good boy. Always very careful and it felt good to be rolled every other day. I knew I must be special. It seemed like the man would bring people out to see me. I could not keep count of how many people would come to the field where I grew and look around at the pumpkins.

One day I noticed that the people were not just looking at the pumpkins, but they would take the older ones and cut their stems and take them home with them. The people looked so very happy that I hoped that someday someone would take me home with them. But the man would always tell people that they couldn’t have me. He said that I was Jim’s pumpkin! I was so excited to know that Jim would be taking me home.

The day finally came when Jim would take me home. He came to the field with a knife and cut my stem. This didn’t feel too good, but I thought it couldn’t be that bad. Surely the pain would go away and I would have such a good time living with Jim. Jim took me home and set me on the front porch. He went inside and when he had a strange look on his face. I was excited, but at the same time, it made me nervous the way Jim was looking at me. Jim sat down next to me and picked me up and put me in his lap. I was so glad he was holding me. I felt comforted to know that Jim cared about me. Suddenly there was a sharp pain at my top. Jim was cutting into me. He cut a big circle all around my stem and opened me up. He began removing my insides and scraping to get everything out. The pain was excruciating. I yelled for him to stop and begged, but he could not hear me.

I was just a pumpkin.

This was my fate.

It seemed like the torture would go on forever. Jim must have spent an hour or two cutting, carving, scraping and gouging. Finally, Jim put me down and stood up to look at me. He had a smile on his face. I could still feel the pain from his torture, but the smile on his face was not evil or menacing, but happy. Whatever he had done to me had made him happy. He ran inside and came back out with a candle and matches. He put fire inside me.

It was warm.

It felt good to be warm…like when I used to sit in the field in the sun.

——————

I wrote this story back in 2004 when I worked at the Boys & Girls Club in Abilene, TX. I love to pull it out at this time of year! Hope you enjoyed a little trip into the darker parts of my mind!

"This is a country that often has transformational ambitions, but is saddled with an incremental..."

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 10:12:00 -0500

“This is a country that often has transformational ambitions, but is saddled with an incremental system, a nation built on revolution, then engineered so the revolutionary can rarely take hold”

- Anna Quindlen - Hope Springs Eternal - Newsweek 10/24/09

You can read the full article here. I am not quoting this to share a political stance. I think that this thought is profound when you change the word “country” to “church”. How is this statement true or not true for churches?

Black Swan Song

Sun, 25 Oct 2009 23:03:45 -0500

I was recently introduced to the song “Black Swan Song” by Athlete on twitter. I really like this band and this song is amazing! I have embedded the video to this song a little further down the post, but first I want us to get our minds in the right area. I want us to look at a couple of terms that I believe are referenced in this song.

First is the term “swan song”. Many of you may have heard this term before, but here is how Wikipedia defines it:

The phrase “swan song” is a reference to an ancient belief that the Mute Swan is completely mute during its lifetime until the moment just before it dies, when it sings one beautiful song.

Not actually true, but the imagery is so appealing that it has been used in literature over the centuries many, many times. By extension, “swan song” has become an idiom referring to a final theatrical or dramatic appearance, or any final work or accomplishment. It generally carries the connotation that the performer is aware that this is the last performance of his or her lifetime, and is expending everything in one magnificent final effort.

Stick this idea in the back of your mind for a little bit. We will come back to it in a minute.

The second term is “black swan”. Again I have found great information about this term from Wikipedia:

The term Black Swan comes from the 17th century European assumption that ‘All swans are white’. In that context, a black swan was a symbol for something that was impossible or could not exist. This all changed of course when black swans were discovered in Western Australia in the 18^th Century.

It is like when people today say, “Well, that will happen when pigs fly!” or “When hell freezes over!” It is just a way of saying that whatever you are talking about will never happen.

The Black Swan Theory concerns high-impact, hard-to-predict, and rare events beyond the realm of normal expectations. Today, this is most typically a reference to a negative event.

Can you think of any events in recent history or better yet in your life that would be considered a black swan?

You might think of September 11, 2001 or Pearl Harbor. You might think of when a significant family member passed away unexpectedly or when you or someone close to you came down with cancer or diabetes.

I have been thinking of this idea of black swan recently with what my father-in-law is going through. He injured his knee a few weeks ago and as he was reaching for some pain medicine in the cabinet he blacked out. He woke up bruised and unable to move on the floor. Over the course of the next few hours he made his way across the floor to his bedroom where he got to his phone and called his son. 12 hours later paramedics were taking him away in an ambulance. His heart stopped 4 times that night and he now has a pacemaker. Less than 2 years ago he had a physical that showed him to be as strong and healthy as a horse. It just doesn’t make sense. This was totally unexpected. His life will never be the same.

This was definitely a black swan.

What kind of emotions does a person go through when they are faced with a black swan?

Pain
Saddness
Fear
Worry
Doubt

Listen to the following song by Athlete.

Athlete on MUZU.

Can you identify the black swan?

What feelings are expressed as a result of the main characters black swan?

The chorus form this song is as follows:

I’ve been racing the clock,
And I’ve run out of steam,
I am ready for my final symphony.
Oh, my body is weak,
But my soul is still strong,
I am ready to rest in your arms.

The character struggles to keep going. He is scared and just wants the terror to end. He is ready for his “final symphony”, his swan song. He just wants it to all be over. He feels physically weak and just wants peace. Certain scriptures come to my mind when I hear this chorus:

Matthew 26:41 - Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak.

Matthew 11:28 - Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

I think, at times like this, it is quite common, whether we admit it or not, to cry out to God and ask if he notices our suffering? Does he care? Why would he allow you to suffer through such pain and agony if He was really looking out for you?

I believe He does care and I believe it pains Him to see us suffer.

Look at the story of Jesus and Lazarus from John 11. Jesus hangs back a few days before going to see his friend and when he gets there Lazarus has been dead for 4 days. Lazarus’s sisters Mary and Martha are torn apart by what seemed like Jesus’ lack of concern for their brother. “If you had been here, my brother would not have died.” cries Martha. According to John, Jesus knew all along what he was going to do. He knew before Lazarus died that he would bring him back from the dead and yet when he saw the pain in the eyes of the family and friends he could not help but feel their pain.

He cared deeply about them.

Even knowing what was about to happen, Jesus broke down and wept with them. He understood their feelings of loss and sorrow. It was agonizing to witness such pain. He cared about them and he cares about us, too.

Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me. - Psalm 23:4

He is with us always, walking beside us and comforting us.

I think Paul had the best attitude when it came to black swans. Listen to what Paul says in his letter to the church in Philippi:

For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, so that through my being with you again your joy in Christ Jesus will overflow on account of me.

Paul is writing this letter from prison and would love to just die and be done with it, but he knows that he has something to gain from this experience and something left to offer as words of hope and encouragement to those who will listen. He understood the need to go on, if not for himself for others. You’ve got to know that the young up-and-coming pharisee Paul would have never imagined he would go from killing Christians to being imprisoned for being the most outspoken of them all!

But Paul would not give up.

He would not let this black swan be the end.

He would not allow this black swan to be his swan song.

Let me tell you one last story to explain what I mean. There is a young woman I know that loved to play basketball. Not only did she love the sport, she was amazing at it. Her future was defined by what she could do in athletics. This would be the key to college scholarships. Possibly she would pursue the WNBA or coaching or who knows? However you looked at it, everything revolved around basketball.

And then her freshman year of high school the doctors told her that she had a choice.

She could play basketball now or she could walk when she was 35.

She had terrible knees and playing basketball would cripple her. She was devastated. How could something like this happen? Why would this gift be taken from her? What was she supposed to do with her life now that basketball was gone?

Her depression over this loss lasted a couple of years. But if you talk to this high school senior today you will not find a person without hope. You will also not find a person who’s life has anything to do with basketball either. Because of different opportunities that opened up for her over the past few years, her heart and mind have been molded into a passion that can only be from God. She wants to go into business and create a company that works much like Tom’s Shoes. She wants to create a business dedicated to making a difference in the world to care for those less fortunate and hurting.

Her black swan was not her swan song.

And the world will be a better place for it.

May God bring us comfort during our times of pain and sorrow and guide us with his comforting hand through the struggles that shatter our world and change our lives forever.

And may we look to find the purpose in God’s plan, to rise from the ashes and make a difference in the world around us because of the different circumstances that surround us.

Movie Review: Away We Go

Mon, 12 Oct 2009 17:36:06 -0500

You can watch the trailer for “Away We Go” on YouTube here.

Here is the plot summary from IMDB.com - A couple who is expecting their first child travel around the U.S. in order to find a perfect place to start their family. Along the way, they have misadventures and find fresh connections with an assortment of relatives and old friends who just might help them discover “home” on their own terms for the first time.

I have to say that I really liked this movie. It spoke to me in a way that very few movies have. This is basically a coming of age movie for couples in their 30’s. It sounds funny to think of a coming of age story at that point in life, but there is a great transition that happens in a relationship when 2 become 3 or more. This transition has taken place in my life within the past 5 years and the memories are still fresh and I am honestly still processing some of the questions of parenting, spousal relationships, friendships, and all that that this movie can and does dig up.

I am so torn as to what to say about this movie. I really, really want to recommend this movie to everyone I know, but there is so much in there that I think would be offensive to so many people. How do you recommend a movie like that? I think there is a great message here about commitment and love. About making purposeful decisions rather than just reacting to life and finding yourself somewhere you never meant to be. About building your family’s life around what is important to your family rather than outside influences. About realizing the gift of family and the blessing of children and parents. About doubt and uncertainty. I am sure there is more, but that is what comes to mind as I write this.

I would love to be able to watch this movie with some other young couples and talk about the themes presented. But I am afraid that so many people would not be able to see the messages in this movie because of some of the movie’s crass humor or sexual themes. It is unfortunate that small things can distract and distort the bigger things. Oh, well…

Good movie with a powerful story that I don’t feel I can recommend to anyone. After reading this review, if you are willing to take the chance on this movie, let me know what you think!

Hidden Wounds

Fri, 09 Oct 2009 23:04:46 -0500

This last week, I have been suffering a great deal of pain. I have had back issues for a few years now and have found great relief by going to the chiropractor. I had been fairly regular in my visits to the chiropractor, once a month until this summer. I slacked off and for the past month I have told myself I needed to get back on track. Minor aches and pains bothered me, but for the most part nothing big. That is until this last Monday. It seemed like there was no warning. The pain got steadily worse as the day went on and by that night, it was intense. I could not find relief by the typical pain medications. I found a bottle of codeine left over from a root canal a few years ago and decided to give it a try. That stuff worked like magic and cut through the pain, but I knew this was not going to be something I should continue to do. I called the chiropractor the next morning and was able to get an appointment that day to get adjusted. I have now been three times this week and the pain is more manageable. When necessary, I can just use tylenol and the pain subsides.

The chiropractor informed me that my symptoms indicate a herniated disc in my spine, but a diagnosis could not be certain without an MRI. I might eventually need an MRI, but for the time, he can treat my condition all the same. I am so thankful to be able to be able to go to the doctor and have my needs cared for.

All this being said, I try not to hurt myself or do anything too strenuous. I have been taking it easy and this is tough because there things that I enjoy doing that push me past my tolerance levels. Things like lifting my children and carrying them have become extremely taxing. Not cool.

The other day, one of our older ladies at the church found me and asked if I could help her carry a box of material inside the church for some quilting that was going to happen in a couple weeks. I agreed and was thankful that it was a small and fairly light box. Not too bad.

This lady is so sweet and had no idea that I was injured otherwise I am sure she would not have asked. When she saw me she did not see someone who was broken or wounded. She could not see my injury or pain. I looked just fine to her and she had no idea what was going on inside. I carried around a hidden wound and my healing is slow and difficult.

My wound is physical, but many of us carry around mental or emotional wounds that are just as debilitating and crippling to our spiritual journey with God. We seem just fine from the outside. We carry on our lives in front of others as if nothing is wrong most of the time and no one ever knows how we hurt. Not unless we allow others in on our secret.

My wife has been wonderful. She is amazing and sensitive and helpful. She has not allowed me to do things that would cause me pain or continue to injure my back. She has looked out for me and protected me. I can’t imagine what it would be like without her love and care.

I know there are a million resources out there on spiritual and emotional healing so I don’t intend to explore all of that her or even to site resources I have found. Google it and you will come up with more than you will be able to go through. The one thing that I want to emphasize in this post is the amazing blessing it is to have people around you that you can share your pain with. People who can love you, help you, hold you accountable so you don’t hurt yourself more, and walk alongside you as you work through your pain. God blesses us in times like these with the people he surrounds us with and if we are willing we can be used by God to be a blessing to others.

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. ~ 1 Thessalonians 5:11

Ordinary People (part 2c)

Mon, 05 Oct 2009 23:14:20 -0500

Well, I didn’t get many comments from my last blog post. I am sure that the 18 million people who visited my site had something to contribute…

What was that?

Oh…18 people…not 18 million…

Thank you Google Analytics for keeping me humble…

I do get comments, some on the web, and some in person. I really appreciate the feedback. It turns this into a conversation instead of a lecture! (Really, who wants a lecture!?)

I love the song in the last post. I hope you took the time to listen to it. It is beautiful and poignant. There are a few things that I want to point out from the song that I think sum up the point of this portion of my thoughts about ordinary people.

There is a committed relationship. The man is singing to his beloved and his message is one of unity. He is not hiding any of the feelings that they both share. They both make mistakes and they both often feel like giving up and walking away, but they are committed to one another and this relationship. Do we see this kind of relationship of commitment in the body of Christ? How about just in your local church you are a part of? This disunity that I mentioned in part 2a comes from our lack of commitment to our church family. We don’t see it like we see a marriage or our view of marriage is shaky. The last thing we want to happen to a marriage is divorce. The last thing we should want to happen in a church family is for someone to leave the family and try to find a place somewhere else or worse yet, to not care about finding that place. This song gives us the picture of love we should see when we look at our church family. Christ looks at the church as his bride and if we follow his example, we would too.

A friend shared a story with me of a time when she heard through the grapevine that her son had gotten a tongue ring. She was so upset about this. She admits that she does not know why it upset her so much, but she was livid. She went right up to him and told him that it was either her or the tongue ring. She walked out the door to leave and go to work, but before she ever reached her car he turned her around and held out his hand. In it was the tongue ring. She meant more to him than any fashion statement. He loved her enough to put aside what he wanted and what he thought was cool. Because he loved her he made a sacrifice for her. Do we love our church family enough to sacrifice for them? Even when we don’t agree with what is happening? Especially when we don’t agree with what is happening? Do we love them this much?

As we look more at this song we see a story of give and take. Back and forth. One line says “as our love advances we take second chances”. We don’t have the patience for second chances without love. We don’t give second chances without a love that doesn’t keep a record of wrong. We need a love that hopes. A love that perseveres. A love that never fails.

The climax of the song does a back and forth with possibilities…

live and learn…crash and burn

maybe you’ll stay…maybe you’ll leave…maybe you’ll return

maybe another fight…maybe we won’t tonight

and then the final line with hope and encouragement says “maybe we’ll grow”…

There is a love that doesn’t want to give up. There is a love that will give it a second chance. There is a love that grows closer and tighter through the good times and the bad. There is a love of Christ.

There is a line in this song repeated dozens of times “Maybe we should take it slow”. When I hear this I think of the verse in James 1:19:

Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.

It is like the temper tantrum control method where we take a deep breath, count to ten, and then react.

I guess sometimes we could count to 10,000 and we still struggle to find peace and love for our church family. We need to take things slow and allow ourselves to handle difficult situations with love. We need to be committed enough to each other that we are willing to take it slow, to love like Christ, and find a way to make things work.

We need to love these ordinary people.

We need to be loved as we, too, are ordinary people.

Then, because we love each other enough to get along, our efforts will be united to heal our hurting world.

Then, because we love each other enough to get along, the good news of God can be heard.

Because we love each other enough.

Book Review: A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller

Tue, 29 Sep 2009 01:00:00 -0500

I recently had the privilidge of reading Donald Miller’s new book A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. In this book, Donald Miller takes us through the process of editing a life in order to write a story, his life to be exact. As always, Miller mixes humor with insight to share his wisdom about how to intentionally live a life as a story with a purpose.

This book is almost too easy to read. It is deceptive in its simplicity when the concepts and ideas are so powerful and profound. I think often with books like this, the worth of the book lies in its power to actually affect the way you look at life or live life after the last page is read. I mentioned in an earlier blog post that things that fit into this category are not common. When something comes along that actually changes you, it is remarkable.

I believe my life is different after reading this book. I couldn’t wait to share with my wife what I had read and what we should do. I was really inspired by this book and I want to purposefully create a story for myself and my family. Miller paints a beautiful picture of a scene after death where we sit with God under a tree and share with Him the stories from our lives. I pray that I have many stories to share with God and to hear Him say, “Yes, I remember that. I was there. This is a good story. Well done!”

Ordinary People (part 2b)

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 01:36:06 -0500

Please listen to the following song by John Legend called “Ordinary People”. I plan to follow up this post with how I believe this song can shed some light on how to love church people. I have pasted the lyrics below. Please leave a comment with your thoughts and ideas.

(Due to copyright restrictions I don’t think I can upload the mp3 I have on my computer to this site. I don’t know why, but the embedded player will only play 30 sec. of the song. Please click the link that says “Play Full Song Here” to listen to the entire song on imeem.com.)

Ordinary People - John Legend

“Ordinary People”

Girl, I’m in love with you,
but this ain’t the honeymoon
we’re past the infatuation phase.
We’re right in the thick of love,
at times we get sick of love,
it seems like we argue every day.

[Bridge]

I know I misbehaved
and you made your mistakes
and we both still got room left to grow.
And though love sometimes hurts,
I still put you first
and we’ll make this thing work,
but I think we should take it slow.

[Chorus]

We’re just ordinary people,
we don’t know which way to go.
‘Cos we’re ordinary people,
Maybe we should take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.

[Verse 2]

This ain’t a movie no,
no fairy tale conclusion ya’ll,
it gets more confusing every day.
Oh, sometimes it’s heaven sent,
then we head back to hell again,
we kiss then we make up on the way.

[Bridge]

I hang up, you call,
we rise and we fall
and we feel like just walking away,
but as our love advances
we take second chances,
though it’s not a fantasy
I Still want you to stay.

[Chorus]

We’re just ordinary people,
we don’t know which way to go.
‘Cos we’re ordinary people,
Maybe we should take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.

[Verse 3]

Take it slow.

Maybe we’ll live and learn,
maybe we’ll crash and burn,
maybe you’ll stay, maybe you’ll leave,
maybe you’ll return.
Maybe another fight,
maybe we won’t survive,
but maybe we’ll grow,
we never know, baby you and I.

[Chorus]

We’re just ordinary people,
we don’t know which way to go.
‘Cos we’re ordinary people,
Maybe we should take it slow.
We’re just ordinary people,
we don’t know which way to go.
‘Cos we’re ordinary people,
Maybe we should take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.
Take it slow.
This time we’ll take it slow.

Ordinary People (part 2a)

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 00:22:27 -0500

I want to continue this discussion about what it means to think of ourselves as ordinary people. This was not intended to be a degrading comment, but possibly an idea that places us on equal ground to gain a perspective of our place in life…and our potential. I think this continued conversation about ordinary people has many different points that all help us gain a different perspective on how we live life in this world filled with a bunch of ordinary people.

Lets look at a question to help us set the tone of this conversation and give us some roots.

Why do we put up with the people in our church?

I bet there are thoughts of people right now swimming through your head about people that bother you, anger you, hurt you, or annoy you at your church. I mean there has to be at least one person that rubs you the wrong way. We are human and we will have our issues, right?

So why do we put up with each other or maybe a better question, what enables us to put up with each other?

Love

It sounds simple, but can be so hard. Lets look at the how Paul describes love in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (NIV)

I think we seriously grapple with many of these things.

love is patient…wow…and that was the first one!

Love does not keep a record of wrongs…really?

Love always trusts…come on!

If we can do this love stuff with our church family, then I think we can do anything! I say this with a bit of sarcasm and a bit of truth. This kind of love is the hardest thing that we struggle to do and if we as Christians were truely united with this kind of love the world would be a different place.

The world would be different.

I truly believe what I just said and I truly believe we fail to do this. Why would there be so many different denominations if we could get along? Or better yet, why would there be so many different churches of the same denomination in one town if we could get along? I understand the history of church planting. Communities with a church on every corner, but that was 50 years ago. Today, I would wager that the number one reason most churches are created today, or have been created in the past 20 yeas, is because we can’t get along with each other so we decide to take the easy way out and disassociate ourselves with our now former family. We choose not to show love and instead choose to distance ourselves into two separate entities.

The voice of God cannot be heard over the roar of our debates and bickering. The message of God never has the chance to reach the ears of the unbeliever because we fill the air with our message of discontentment with each other.

Because we don’t love each other enough to get along our efforts are not united to heal our hurting world.

Because we don’t love each other enough to get along the good news of God cannot be heard.

Because we don’t love each other enough.

Please take the time to experience the next post Ordinary People (part 2b) and leave a comment with your thoughts.

Book Suggestion: 12 Ordinary Men

Sun, 20 Sep 2009 23:16:50 -0500

I wanted to make this addition to my previous blog post:

More ideas from the previous blog post can be found in the book 12 Ordinary Men by John MacArthur. I have not read the entire book, but the portions that I have read are really good! It is going on my book list for the near future and I would recommend checking it out to find out more about 12 men God decided to use to change the world. This is just a story about those 12. The Bible contains stories of more and history contains even more stories of ordinary people just like you and me that did extra-ordinary things.

Ordinary People (part 1)

Sun, 20 Sep 2009 23:12:27 -0500

I have come across a problem that I believe most people in the world struggle with from time to time. We begin to believe that some people are super. This may not sound like such a bad thing at first and someone’s face possibly even popped into your head as I mentioned super people! But, we have the tendency to place people on a pedestal. The problem is that we hold them in such esteem that the person we imagine when we think of this person is not even a real person anymore.

Stick with me on this one…

Cary Grant was once the coolest man on the planet. His character in The Awful Truth was a unique combination of cool glamour and warm approachability that everyone, including Grant himself, came to marvel at. “Everyone wants to be Cary Grant,” he once said; “even I wish I could be Cary Grant.” The truth is, if you ever had the chance to meet this real person you are amazed by you would be floored at how normal this person was. Has anyone ever been in the presence of a celebrity or someone they thought very highly of and thought, “This person is so awesome and he/she is just a normal, ordinary guy!” We see someone eating and think , “They chew with their mouth open!” or we see someone come out of the bathroom and think, “They have to poop!?” It just amazes us, for some reason, that people have to do people things. Normal everyday, ordinary people things. Just like you and just like me. Amazing!

So here is is. The truth like none other. Everybody is ordinary. Everybody.

Nobody is special. Nobody.

Does this burst your bubble?

I have to tell you that this one statement is one of the most encouraging things that anybody could ever tell me! Confused? Let me explain.

I think that Bono from the Rock band U2 is amazing. I am amazed at his music. I am amazed at his philanthropic work with AIDS relief and efforts to eliminate debts of struggling countries. His work politically to bring nations together to help nations is powerful. He is a Christian and what he believes is reflected in how he lives his life. As an example of absolute cool, in a private meeting between Pope John Paul II and Bono, the Pope decides to wear Bono’s sunglasses! Let me say that again, the Pope wanted to wear Bono’s sunglasses! Does a guy get any cooler than that!? Bono would be someone that I would have a problem seeing as an ordinary guy.

But Bono had his bad days.

Bono goes to the bathroom.

Bono gets angry.

Bono makes mistakes.

Bono is really just an ordinary guy.

Just like me. Just like you.

Now here is the difference between Bono and me. Bono has done some extra-ordinary things. He is an ordinary guy who has done some extra ordinary things. Here is the part that really encourages me…I, as an ordinary guy like Bono, can do extra-ordinary things too!

This idea of ordinary is not limiting, but empowering! We all have within us the ability to do remarkable things.

I think we often don’t feel like we have the ability to do amazing things and so we don’t. Not because we can’t, but because we don’t.

We don’t try.

We don’t look for opportunities.

We don’t imagine possibilities.

We don’t believe in ourselves and so we just don’t.

I believe that we can do extra-ordinary things. I believe that I can do extra-ordinary things. I believe you can do extra-ordinary things.

Need biblical proof, look at the disciples. There was not a more ordinary, plain, simple group of ragtag men ever assembled in all of history. God chose to use these ordinary people to impact the world! God can use ordinary people like Bono to impact the world. God can use ordinary people like you and me to impact the world. Ordinary people, used by God, to do extra-ordinary things.

How is God going to use you?

Movie Review: Slumdog Millionaire

Wed, 16 Sep 2009 23:13:22 -0500

This past weekend, my wife and I watched the movie Slumdog Millionaire. It is the story of an 18 year old kid from Mumbai, who grew up in the slums and becomes a contestant on the Indian version of “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?” He is arrested under suspicion of cheating, and while being interrogated, events from his life history are shown which explain why he knows the answers.

I really liked the story and the way it was told. It was interesting how so many random and unconnected events in this kid’s life would end up giving him the answers to the random and unconnected questions in the game show. It was almost comical how these things came together sometimes. I thought the cinematography was top notch and everything just seemed to fit. A well put together movie. I must admit, this movie was more than just an excuse to eat popcorn and candy. There were themes in this movie that are powerful and realities that are revealed that can’t be ignored. Don’t get the wrong idea. This movie focused on telling the main story and did not become cheesy or over the top as these messages were exposed. This is apparently very difficult to do and I applaud the screenwriters for an excellent job of walking this fine line.

One of the things that really stood out to me was the absolute poverty that was represented in this movie. Images of scrounging through the trash heaps, kids sleeping on top of trash, slums built out of scraps within the areas of the garbage dump, children begging, and more. Other things that seemed to be depicted as a normal way of life, washing clothes in a dirty river, are out of the norm in my American cultural experience. It was really amazing to imagine a world where this could be real and happening today. I know that America’s poor, although still a desperate condition, do not compare to the absolute poverty faced by billions in third world countries around the globe. To get a glimpse into this world and open our eyes to this reality was profound and moving.

The main character, Jamal, is surrounded by the underbelly of his world. Everyone from gang leaders, corrupt officials, sleazy game show hosts, and even his own brother are just terrible and what you would call “low-life-scum”. But through it all, Jamal remains the incorruptible hero with a sense of purpose, honesty, and integrity that defy his upbringing. He does not come across as naive, but realizes the consequences his decisions could have and still continues to do the right thing. This powerful message is seen over and over again in the movie and I think it is a message that we could use more of today. Don’t get me wrong, our hero is not perfect and he makes mistakes. This humanity is what makes his struggles identifiable. We can relate to someone who struggles and makes mistakes and we connect to the better person he is seeking to be.

I really liked this movie and would recommend watching it. Be ready, there are some intense scenes that are not glossed over. It can be disturbing to see the levels of desperation and inhumanity some people will sink to for survival and power. If you choose to watch this movie, may it open your eyes and touch your heart. May your heart be broken by the things that break the heart of God. May you also find inspiration and strength in this story.

Life Change

Fri, 11 Sep 2009 09:27:43 -0500

What are the momentous occasions in life? The big things that really make a difference in the way we live? Like when a person moves away from home or gets married or has children. Maybe when a person begins to actually provide financially for themselves. Possibly there are many steps in this independence phase along life where a person learns to feed themselves, learns to bath themselves, learns to be responsible with school or work, begins paying a bill with their money for something they recieve, and so on. These things either change a life or indicate a change in a life.

These things are big changes that pretty much effect the whole life all at one time. The world this person lives in will never be the same. But I realize that some things in a changed life are more subtle. Or possibly it is the culmination of many things along the same direction that over time make a difference and change a life.

I don’t want to seem like I am getting hung up on phrases or expressions, but sometimes I hear people say, “That book changed my life!” or “That movie changed my life!” Do they say this because they can actually see that they are a different person after this than they were before this? Can they see the change and put their finger on it? Or was this a really good book or movie or whatever that possibly will add to a series of happenings that will have a gradual change over time to make a difference in a life? I don’t want to be critical of this phrase, but I also realize that we are (I will put this in the most positive perspective I can find) a people of stability. We don’t change much. We seek to find a point of stability, of familiarity, of comfort and we stay there. So, it makes me think, “Was this thing really something that is going to move you out of your comfort and stability into something different and unfamiliar?

I don’t believe that we actually come across that many things that will “change our life”. There are just not that many things powerful enough to move us. There are many things, I believe that should change us and I believe that we realize that they should change us, but we don’t allow them to change us. They will not change us because we are unwilling to change. We may read a book or watch a movie or whatever and be struck by some profound themes and we come away from it thinking that we should be different, but in reality nothing happens. At least nothing noticable. At best these things will add up to make a change eventually, but then again nothing may ever happen.

I don’t want to be overly critical of this occurance. I do believe that things like this can add up to create an eventual change in a life, but I think that often we do not allow these things to make the change themselves.

I believe that the things that really change us are truely remarkable. To read a book and it have such a profound impact that it does actually change your life is remarkable. To watch a movie and be so moved to change your life is remarkable. These things don’t happen often, but when they do it is powerful and…life changing.

May God place before us the truely remarkable things with a message that penetrates our comfort and stability to impact our soul and change our lives.

And may we, when presented with something profound, have the willingness to submit to the change that is taking place within us.

The Power of Words Carefully Chosen

Wed, 09 Sep 2009 22:45:25 -0500

I have been really turned off lately by a phrase that has become a part of our vocabulary. I hear it all the time and I don’t believe it is meant to cause harm, but I wonder if it is not causing more damage than we realize. When we meet someone and find out they are a Christian, we ask the the question, “What church do you attend?”

Seems harmless, right?

You may say, “what is the big deal? That seems like a perfectly valid question!”

The information that we seek is not what is inappropriate to me about this question. It is the word “attend”. It has an edge to it that is about to drive me nuts! People attend concerts, movies, ballets, and the theater. Why on earth would we ask them about a church that they attend?! You may think that I am making too big a deal about this and that I have gone off the deep end, and maybe you are right! But when we begin inserting the idea that church is a thing that you attend I believe we diminish the scope of what church could and should be.

Maybe we have never really looked for the appropriate word for this question. Like I said before, I don’t think the answer we are asking for is inappropriate, but the wording shows us what we think of church in our culture. Is church really a thing that we should attend? What if by giving this question, and other statements about church, better wording, we can change our culture’s perspective on what church could and should be?

Does this sound like to much to ask of a simple word choice? I don’t think so!

I want to hear some of your thoughts. I have an idea or two and will follow up this blog next week. Until then, leave you thoughts in the comments so that we may all be enriched by your perspective.

Getting Back to Good Things

Wed, 09 Sep 2009 22:23:00 -0500

As I blow the dust off my blog, I type these words…

It has been an unfortunate amount of time since I have posted. I expect there are many things that have kept me away. I would like to think that it has been a lack of time due to the busyness of the summer. I think there may be some truth to that, but I know that if I had really wanted to blog, I would have. I think I just didn’t know what to say.

Many things have been going through my head these last few months and I have struggled to get a grip on my brain. I have felt clouded and frustrated. But things seem to be different now. I don’t want to give him a big head (or bigger head…for those of you that know him), but I have RobertBlas to thank for much of my new found clarity. He sent me away for a few days to clear my head and collect my thoughts. I did not come back with all the problems of the world wrapped up in nice neat little packages. My life was still just as messy as before, but this getaway gave me the opportunity to step back, stop time almost, and look at what was going on in my life and identify some areas that had become a real challenge. It is amazing the feeling of coming out of the dark. Like I said before I still had problems after my getaway, but I knew, at least better than before, what those problems were.

I have been thinking that I need this blog. I need the avenue that it can give me to gain some perspective from those of you who are kind enough to read it. I feel that in many ways I have some thoughts that need thinking. My mind is not big enough to think these thoughts alone and I need help. I honestly have many things to blog about - some serious, some not so serious, and some just downright silly. I believe I have been avoiding this blog because I have been afraid to blog the serious thoughts. I want to find strength in sharing and so I will. Don’t worry, they will not all be serious!

As I collect these thoughts I will share them, but I also want to make a commitment. This is not so much for you, but for me. If it is true that I need this outlet to get things out and put into words thoughts and feelings, then I need to commit myself to doing this. One of the best ways to do this is to tell people what I am going to do. Allow that to be a motivator to keep doing what I said I would do. And so here it is…I want to blog at least once a week. I will put up a post by Friday of each week. It may happen more, but it will not happen less. That is not too hard is it?

So, if you are reading this, you know about my blog. If you are willing to help me, leave me a comment when I post. Tell me what you think about what I put into words. If you feel so moved, tell your friends and encourage them to leave a comment too! I believe it will do me good to hear a perspective other than my own as I look for answers to the things that challenge me.